Snake in the toilet

Before you go all FREAKING out because the title is called Snake in the toilet, let me tell you there was NOT a snake in my toilet. Here is the deal:

Sometimes the dog wakes up in the middle of the night, and smacks his lips, sits up like he is begging for a treat, and wags his tail against the floor and starts whining. This is an indication that he needs to go to the bathroom. At this point in the night, Josy pushes me a little and says, "Can you let the dog out?" to which I reply, "Mphh". Then I get up and let the dog out. I sleep on the couch next to the door until he whines to come in, then I let him in. Inevitably, I have to go to the bathroom at this point because that is what happens when you wake up. Try as i might, I am awake at this point, so , to the bathroom I go. This morning when this scenario played out at roughly 3:30, I got to thinking. What if there is a snake in the toilet. I have not turned the light on, so I have no idea, and I am sitting there (because I know what kinda trouble I would get into if I tried to aim at this time in the morning), and freaked myself out, because you and I know that A) peeing on a snake would be the number one way to get bit, and B) the snake would bite the low hanging fruit if you know what I mean. Anyway, I went as fast as I could, then jumped up and danced over to the bed and tried to go back to sleep. Sleep finally came at 5:45 just after the first time the clock-alarm went off.